Maybe even suicide would have...

Maybe even suicide would have been too active. Maybe in some lives you just float around and expect nothing else and don‘t even try to change. Maybe that was most lives. - P84

Look at me ... on a stage! And someone told me recently, they told me that my problem isn‘t actually stage fright.
My problem is life fright. And you know what? They‘re fucking right. Because life is frightening, and it is frightening for a reason,
and the reason is that it doesn‘t matter which branch of a life we get to live, we are always the same rotten tree. I wanted to be many things in my life. All kinds of things. But if your life is rotten, it will be rotten no matter what you do. The damp rots the whole useless thing....
- P113