소설이 한 권 보고 싶어졌다. 온힘을 다해 지난 계절의 수분을 빼어내는 겨울나무를 보다가... 언젠가 사두었던 코맥 맥카시의 <피빛 자오선>을 열었다.
영어로 하면 Blood... Fascinating! 이다. 그러고 보니 <노인을 위한 나라는 없다>,<로드>,<피빛 자오선>을 본 셈인데, 그는 아직 단 한번도 나를 실망시킨 적이 없다. 이 중 으뜸은 <피빛 자오선>이다. 논란이 될 말한 결말 부분 역시 개인적으로는 흡족하다.
이러다 국경 3부작을 다 따라가게 되는 것은 아닐까 하는 생각마저 든다. (읽어야 할 책들도 많은데...이런.... 특정한 목적을 위한 것이 아닌 '전작 읽기'는 내게 스노비즘의 의혹을 들게 한다.)
초식의 환상으로 폭력의 삶을 건너려는 세계에 죽은 동물의 내장을 통과하고 날아오는 비릿한 모래 바람은 어떤 종류의 난처함을 던져줄까?
어제 밤 회식에서 돌아온 후 취기에 모 시인의 시집을 읽었다. 계란을 벽에 던지듯 시집을 던져버렸다. 고깃살에 뚝뚝 떨어지는 지난 생존의 상징이 주는 역겨움이 차라리 낫다. 반백의 시간, 고행의 숨결을 통해 겨우 닿은 곳이 그곳이었다면 말이다.
1.<피빛 자오선>이 영화로도 만들어진다기에 혹시하고 유투브를 뒤져봤다. 영화 티저가 하나 있는데 실제 영화 홍보물은 아니었다. 호주 시드니에 사는 한 대학생이 과제로 만든 작품이다.
2.유투브를 뒤지다가 예일대학 공개강의에서 <1945년 이후 미국문학>에서 <Blood meridian>을 다루는 강의를 잠시 들었다. 실존 인물 홀든에 대한 이야기도 있다. 90분 강연물이어서 살짝 보고 나왔는데 좀 한가해지면 다시 찾아봐야겠다.
3. 홀든 판사가 전쟁에 대해 설하는 장면이 있다. 나름 역사를 가진 흔한 이야기지만 인상적인 장면으로 포함 될 만하다. 홀든식으로 생각하든 홀든에 대결하든 말이다. 지금 이 곳에는 너무 많은 늙은 홀든과 홀든이 좋아하는 젊은이들이 살고 있나?
어쨋거나 어제 그 시집을 던져버린 것은 후회하지 않는다.
The good book says that he that lives by the sword shall perish by the sword, said the black.
The judge smiled, his face shining with grease. What right man would have it any other way? he said.
The good book does indeed count war an evil, said Irving. Yet there's many a bloody tale of war inside it.
It makes no difference what men think of war, said the judge. War endures. As well ask men what they think of stone. War was always here. Before man was, war waited for him. The ultimate trade awaiting its ultimate practitioner. That is the way it was and will be. That way and not some other way.
He turned to Brown, from whom he'd heard some whispered slur or demurrer. Ah, Davy, he said. It's your own trade we honor here. Why not rather take a small bow. Let each acknowledge each.
My trade?
Certainly.
What is my trade?
War. War is your trade. Is it not?
And it ain't yours?
Mine too. Very much so.
What about all them notebooks and bones and stuff?
All other trades are contained in that of war.
Is that why war endures?
No. It endures because young men love it and old men love it in them. Those that fought, those that did not.
That's your notion.
The judge smiled. Men are born for games. Nothing else. Every child knows that play is nobler than work. He knows too that the worth or merit of a game is not inherent in the game itself but rather in the value of that which is put at hazard. Games of chance require a wager to have meaning at all. Games of sport involve the skill and strength of the opponents and the humiliation of defeat and the pride of victory are in themselevs sufficient stake because they inhere in the worth of the principals and define them. But trial of chance or trial of worth all games aspire to the condition of war for here that which is wagered swallows up game, player, all.
Suppose two men at cards with nothing to wager save their lives. Who has not heard such a tale? A turn of the card. The whole universe for such a player has labored clanking to this moment which will tell if he is to die at that man's hand or that man at his. What more certain validation of a man's worth could there be? This enhancement of the game to its ultimate state admits no argument concerning the notion of fate. The selection of one man over another is a preference absolute and irrevocable and it is a dull man indeed who could reckon so profound a decision without agency or significance either one. In such games as have for their stake the annihilation of the defeated the decisions are quite clear. This man holdgin this particular arrangement of cards in his hand is thereby removed from existence. This is the nature of war, whose stake is at once the game andthe authority and the justification. Seen so, war is the truest form of divination. It is the testing of one's will and the will of another within that larger will which because it binds them is therefore forced to select. War is the ultimate game because war is at least a forcing of the unity of existence. War is god. "