Trans. of Zhuangzi 2.13 w/ Guo Xiang‘s Comment

2.13

罔兩問景曰：「曩子行，今子止；曩子坐，今子起；何其無特操與？」 

景曰：「吾有待而然者邪？吾所待又有待而然者邪？吾待蛇蚹蜩翼邪？

惡識所以然！惡識所以不然！」

Translation: The Penumbra asked the Shadow, “In the old days, you used to move forward, but now you are at rest. In the old days, you used to sit, but now you are on your feet; why don’t you go about your way on your own?” The Shadow said, “Am I like this because I have something to cling onto? Is it that the thing which I depend on also has something to depend on? Are the things which I depend on akin to that of the scales on a snake or the wings of a cicada? How do I know for what reason is this so? And how do I know for what reason it is not?”

Guo Xiang’s commentary:

世或謂罔兩待景，景待形，形待造物者。請問：夫造物者，有耶無耶？無也？

則胡能造物哉？有也？則不足以物眾形。故明眾形之自物而後始可與言造物耳。

是以涉有物之域，雖復罔兩，未有不獨化於玄冥者也。

Translation: It is said that the Penumbra is to be the Shadow, then the Shadow is to take form, and the form is to be created. Let me ask you - are there any Creators or not? There is not? But what if they can create things? There is one? Then they are not sufficient enough to form a multitude. Therefore, all the individual forms can then be used to speak to things with ears. In the realm of things, although the Penumbra is no more, xuan is not there to be controlled. 

Translation of Zhuangzi 2.8 & 2.9

2.8

今且有言於此，不知其與是類乎？其與是不類乎？類與不類，相與為類，則與彼無以異矣。雖然，請嘗言之。有始也者，有未始有始也者，有未始有夫未始有始也者。有有也者，有無也者，有未始有無也者，有未始有夫未始有無也者。俄而有無矣，而未知有無之果孰有孰無也。今我則已有謂矣，而未知吾所謂之其果有謂乎，其果無謂乎？

Translation: Now I have something to say about it, but I don’t know whether it’s of similar kind or not. The same kind or not, they are indistinguishable from each other. Nonetheless, please allow me to explain it. There is a beginning that begins before the beginning, and a beginning even before that. There is something and there is nothing. Before that is nothing and even before that is nothing. Suddenly there is nothing, but I still do not know which is something and nothing. Today I’ve said hence, but I am not sure whether this has resulted in something or not. 

2.9

天下莫大於秋豪之末，而大山為小；莫壽乎殤子，而彭祖為夭。天地與我並生，而萬物與我為一。既已為一矣，且得有言乎？既已謂之一矣，且得無言乎？一與言為二，二與一為三。自此以往，巧歷不能得，而況其凡乎！故自無適有，以至於三，而況自有適有乎！無適焉，因是已。

Translation: Nothing in the world is bigger than the end of autumn, and Mt. Tai appears small. No old thing is more tragic than the death of the child, and Pengzu died young. Heaven and earth were born when I was born, and it all becomes one with me. It’s already a whole, so need I say more? I have said that it’s a whole, so how am I speechless? One is two, two and one are three. From then on, even the experienced and skilled ones couldn’t lead us on, let alone the ordinary men. If we went from nothing to something and got to three, how could we go from something to something? There is nothing to be desired, for it is the way it is.

전혜린 - 목마른 계절

Anthony Browne - Zoo

05.17

Dear Father,

Today, we went on a field trip to the Bronx Zoo. We left the school at ten in the morning and came back around one in the afternoon. Everyone in class brought maps to the zoo like they were ready to become experts like the locals! Some parents accompanied and helped us find our ways in the crowed zoo; I deeply appreciate them. 

The trip was quite different from what I was expecting the place to be, where large, marvelous animals roam about. The first series of exhibits we saw was indoors. It was stinking! The giant rhinos just laid there, staring at us. Next, we saw the California sea lions on the outdoor exhibit. I noticed how the pool was too small for those playful ones. We then continued walking to see an expressionless gelada with mountain goats. The mountain goats were facing the back, so I could only see their abundant white fur. Near that cage was the sight of exhausted giraffes. I could feel that they didn't like our attention and the incessant camera flash. We also saw a grizzly bear. The bear seemed so bored, moving back and forth with no aim in its eyes, and that bored me, too.

In the birds' exhibit, we saw the bald eagles. However, before I even got a good look of them, I had to move away for the preschool kids, who, also like us, were on the trip. Meanwhile, flamingos kept eating and eating while standing. They did nothing besides that. Peacocks were relatively free to be on the streets, but they were walking around unpleasantly because people stopped them frequently to stare rudely long at their beautiful eyes on their feather when it opened. 

We kept walking around, cage after cage. In between the walks, we took brief rests, during which my mind wandered far, and traveled back in time to when I finished reading Zoo by Anthony Browne. I was probably seven then. The story features a boy who visits the zoo with his family. Not knowing what he is walking into, he is basked in anticipation and happiness. When he returns home, his mind is filled with conflicts and inquiries. He did not feel comfortable watching the animals being idle and frustrated behind the bars. The boy's mother tells him that as long as they had fun, it is alright. When I was little, I would find comfort in the mother's words because I loved going to the zoo to see animals. I visited the zoo again five years later today, father. It felt really different.

Papa's sweet darling,

I. C.

Blaise Pascal - Pensees

On Stage 2 210, Pascal describes the “last act,” or death, as “tragic” for that is “the end for ever.” I first had a question there because as he mentioned in Stage 1, if the present is always troublesome to us and unfruitful thoughts plague us as long as we live, then why would death be tragic? Won’t death do us good if it ends our lives which are made up of endless presents that leave us in pain? Then I realized that it actually ties back to the idea discussed in Stage 1 172, which states that we believe that we are just not content yet, but will be in the future, so we entrust our happiness to the future. However, if there is no more future for us by ceasing to exist, then we have no more to desire or look forward to. I agreed very strongly with Pascal here, because I always harbor a longing for the future where I believe that real living would be, while lessening the value of the present which I view as a temporary moment. Yet if life is so fragile that could end anytime by accident, it will be very “tragic,” as Pascal writes, that our life which hasn’t enjoyed any of the present moment would end like that.