As a child, I lived in a constant state of doubt. I had doubts about the way I was supposed to feel and the way I didn’t. Doubts about the things I did. Doubts about the things I wanted to do. Telling the truth about these uncertainties sounded like a good idea in theory, but in practice I found it often made things worse. I could never tell what information was going to cause a negative reaction. It seemed like I was constantly oscillating between the poles of honesty and dishonesty, and I never knew where I would land.
